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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28228692">Smile at Hope in the Name of Abandonment</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/lennardd/pseuds/lennardd'>lennardd</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>AI Chiaki is there also, Angst, Angst and Feels, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, Nagito my poor boy..., Post SDR2 plot, but Nagito hasn't, chiaki is a good friend, he misses his bf, kinda AU-ish tbh, where Hajime has woken from the program</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 16:02:53</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,399</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28228692</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/lennardd/pseuds/lennardd</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>He tried to find any faults, any impossibilities that would surely debunk his own theory. And, the harder he fumbled for a contradiction, none arose. Each and every memory with Hajime made sense, too much sense even.</p>
<p>He was convinced. Convinced he wasn’t the one lying here.</p>
<p>—</p>
<p>In which Nagito suddenly regains his memories of Hajime, and confronts Chiaki on his whereabouts. Chiaki, while confused as to how he remembered, knows she can't tell him the truth.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hinata Hajime/Komaeda Nagito, Komaeda Nagito &amp; Nanami Chiaki</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>118</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Smile at Hope in the Name of Abandonment</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>So,,, yes I love these three and I had this idea for angst and I live for Chiaki and Nagito friendship rights.</p>
<p>Just to quickly explain the prompt I came up with: After Hajime (+survivors) have woken up from the program and plan to wake up everyone else, the simulation resets (to something akin to island mode) and everyone's memories about the killing game (and everyone not in the program currently) is wiped. Chiaki had been reprogrammed back into the simulation as well, and knows about Hajime and the other's plan. One day, however, Nagito suddenly remembers about Hajime's existence. Confrontation ensues.</p>
<p>okay now time for pain,,,, :,)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Hey, Chiaki.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He watched as pink eyes drifted slightly off the dim screen of the Game Girl, and directed their attention on him. It took a few beats, but when he saw the sitting girl rack her brain over who was in front of her, she smiled.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh. Hey, Nagito.” Fingers were still tapping away at buttons, filling the quiet fruity aura of the hotel lobby with a small clicking echo. Once again, Chiaki was still so dedicated to her game, even to converse with someone like him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“...Mind if I sit with you? I… have something I want to ask you.” If it were any other situation, Nagito would’ve probably looked at his hand to not look so stilted, but he just stood there, with the pressing issue on his mind eating at him like a disease. If Chiaki had noticed this difference in stance, then she definitely didn’t let it show.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Of course.” She smiled again, a familiar warmth radiating from it alone. It helped Nagito forget his nerves just for a moment, until he sat down and the thoughts started to swarm at him again. Wringing his wrists for distance comfort, he looked to the floor.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“So,” Chiaki’s eyes eventually made their way back over to the game, “What did you want to talk about?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span> Nagito inhaled deeply, then sighed. “It’s about Hajime.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When Nagito never received a response, he looked over. Chiaki looked confused. No, confused was putting it lightly. She looked absolutely lost. Like what he said was foreign, or crazy. He would understand her expression if he </span>
  <em>
    <span>had</span>
  </em>
  <span> said something people usually didn’t get, like his outlook on hope or talent, but he was pretty sure what he had said wasn’t something to get so worked up about, right?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A retro blast rang out from the handheld console, followed by a failure jingle. “Ha...Hajime…?” She looked right at him this time, brows furrowed.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes,” He started, a hint of confusion echoing into his own voice, “I just remembered about it this morning. Hajime… Hajime’s supposed to be here too, right? His cottage is supposed to be the one next to Byakuya’s but… it’s empty. There’s not even a door plate.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Chiaki took a while to reply. Nagito couldn’t tell if it was just because she was being her usual slow self, or if she was taking each word he said into account. “What do you remember, about Hajime?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>That was a strange question, Nagito thought. “Well… I remember that he forgot his Ultimate talent, but despite that, he’s friends with everyone here. Even me… We actually got very close. He actually wanted to spend time with nobody like me. We even… haha.” He almost got caught up in his own memories before spiralling back to his main concern, a sombre feeling welling up in his chest.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Chiaki didn’t speak again, and he took it as an opportunity to continue.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“So, I was merely wondering… Where is he? Where is Hajime?” He watched as Chiaki fully put down her console, something she had never done before, and turned to face him with a calm look.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Nagito…  I’m not sure what you’re talking about.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“But, you said— you asked me what I remembered about him, which means you do know that he—”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“How could there be someone here called Hajime, if he doesn’t have a cottage? You said it yourself, right? That he doesn’t have a door plate.” She raised a finger, as if she was trying to set the debate straight. Unfortunately for her Nagito was confident he knew more, knew better. The memories were clear in his mind: vivid and life-like, as if they happened yesterday.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I know that’s his cottage. I remember walking past it every morning. I remember seeing him go inside it. I even remember going inside it myself — it had a shelf full of mono bears, and it smelled of fruit, oranges to be exact.” Sure, he wasn’t using evidence to back it up, but surely Chiaki knew this too, right? She’d been in there before, he remembered that too.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Chiaki paused. “Nagito, are you sure this isn’t a dream you remember pretty fondly? I’ve had them before too, you know. It’s alright to think that there was someone else here, but…”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“No. Why are you lying? You should know Hajime — he always talked to you every morning in here. He’d never pass you. How could you forget that?” Now Nagito was becoming frustrated. Was she lying on purpose? But what purpose was there? Why would she hide Hajime’s existence?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Amongst his inner thoughts, he saw as Chiaki slowly reached for her hood, and pulled it up over her head, fingers lingering on either side. “Mmmm…”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Huh?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Um…” She hesitantly began. “Nagito, this might sound silly, but… maybe this Hajime you’re thinking about is actually a coping mechanism. As in, you feel a strong loneliness, and to cope, your mind has created Hajime in order to trick you into believing you’re not. That’s why you remember all these things that aren’t true.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hearing this, made Nagito firstly doubt his own mind. Was it really just as simple as something his mind created? His mind created Hajime? His mind created all those memories with him? Even all the intimate ones? It would explain why Chiaki wasn’t agreeing with him, though. Despite her head always being hunched into her console’s screen, she had a good grip on the reality, and people, around her. So, maybe this was simply all in his head.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>But then, Nagito consulted those memories. He tried to find any faults, any impossibilities that would surely debunk his own theory. And, the harder he fumbled for a contradiction, none arose. Each and every memory with Hajime made sense, too much sense even.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He was convinced. Convinced he wasn’t the one lying here.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s impossible.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Huh?” Chiaki tilted her head.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Impossible. What you’re saying, it’s impossible. Because I saw Hajime hanging out with Mahiru. And Gundham. And Mikan. And even you. Yes… I saw him playing video games with you. How could that… how could I have made that up?” Nagito’s voice raised on the question, hand clenching into a loose fist beside him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“That… I’m sure your brain made you think I was hanging out with this Hajime, when in reality I was—”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Not</span>
  </em>
  <span> ‘this Hajime’. It’s Hajime. Hajime exists. And you know that. And you’re lying.” His clenched fist became tighter, feeling his nails poke at his palm.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dropping her hands from her hood into her lap, Chiaki composed herself. “Nagito, calm down, okay? I know there must be a lot you’re going through, and you’re just… confused.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“...Confused?” Nails began to dig into his palm. “Me? Confused? Ah… Ahahaha… No. I’m not confused.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“...You really think Hajime exists, huh?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Stop acting like you don’t know!” Nagito had raised to his full height, standing over Chiaki with both fists shaking. “Stop acting so unsure! Hajime’s real! And now he’s gone! A-And I don’t where he is and you’re lying about it and I don’t know why and he probably left the island without us knowing and that’s why his door plate is gone because Usami removed it because he’s gone and he’s gone and I don’t understand why because he told me he loved me so why would he leave me and I don’t understand I don’t understand I don’t—”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>SLAP.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The first thing Nagito felt coming back to his senses was that his right cheek burned. It wasn’t burning because it was hot, since he could sense the temperature around him was mild. But it ached like hell regardless. The second thing he felt was something wet on his cheek when he went to feel the burn. As his forefinger retracted, he realised they were tears. He was crying? Why was he crying?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The third and final thing he felt was a dreadful pang in his chest as he looked in front of him to see Chiaki standing with her open hand in the air like she had just slapped someone.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Like she had just slapped someone?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Then he remembered everything.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Nagito.” Chiaki’s arm fell to her side. “I’m sorry. Hajime… is real.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“He… He is?!” Somewhere inside him, Nagito felt a mixture of relief and excitement, before it dissipated completely. “Then… why did you lie?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Instead of replying immediately, Chiaki took Nagito’s hands into her own, and guided them back onto their stools. Not letting go, she looked him softly in the eye. “Hajime isn’t here.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I know that. I’ve been looking for him all morning. That’s why I came to ask you.” Nagito then shook his head. “So why did you lie?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Because he’s fulfilled his purpose here.” Now it was Nagito’s turn to look lost.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What… What does that even mean?” He started to bring his hands away, but Chiaki kept them firm in her grasp.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You remember what we’re supposed to do on this island, right? Usami said we had to collect the hope fragments, I think. So, as you said, Hajime got along with everyone, which probably meant he collected everyone’s hope fragments, even yours. And, once we had collected the hope fragments, we could go home.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re saying Hajime went home? But, surely we’d all go home together, right? And, that’s unlikely anyway! He wouldn’t leave us behind, e-even if he was forced to go, he would fight to stay with us!” Nagito couldn’t help but let his voice waver in volume again.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When Chiaki ceased to respond for the umpteenth time, Nagito felt the frustration boil again. “Are you lying </span>
  <em>
    <span>again</span>
  </em>
  <span>? You finally admit he’s real, and you still can’t just tell me where he is?!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Chiaki’s grip faltered only by little, but just enough for Nagito to notice. “...Why are you pursuing this so much?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Because I wanted to… H-He makes me happy and I just wanted to spend time with him. Other than you, Hajime is the only one who doesn’t mind me there with him. And I… I’ve never met someone like him before. So— Is this my fault? Is this because of my luck? Was it because I was careless and my luck did something to him? O-Oh no, Hajime—!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Nagito.” Chiaki cut off his rambling. “This isn’t to do with your luck. You did nothing wrong.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Then why? Why?!” He was trembling now. It made no sense this morning, and it still didn’t make any sense now. And the fact that Chiaki wasn’t being clear with him only sent him further into his spiral.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“...Hajime isn’t here, but he is safe, okay? I promise.” She smiled reassuringly, as if encouraging him to do the same.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“How do you know that?” He raised a harsh brow.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Chiaki’s smile shrunk. “I… can’t tell you. But, what I can tell you is that Hajime is alright. And, once you get off this island, I’m sure you’ll see him again.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Get off this island…? But, don’t you understand? Hajime was the only one that would willingly hang out with me. No one else cares about me, they don’t even greet me in the morning, or look my way! How do I even have a chance off this island if I can’t even collect any hope fragments?!” Nagito felt the corners of his vision become blurry as all his mind could focus on was his rapid heart beats.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“That isn’t true, Nagito! You—”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I-I just… I just want Hajime back! I want to see him again! I just want to see his face! P-Please! I’m sorry I’m not deserving of you, b-but I just want you to be here! I know I’m being so selfish but I need your hope! All I… ahaha… all I can feel is despair and it’s killing me!” Tears started up again, racing down his cheeks, escaping like his mumbled messed-up words. He couldn’t see Chiaki in front of him anymore — everything was a blur. All he could see was red, or was that pink? He couldn’t even hear her speak — if she even was; sound was a blur too. Was that a ringing in his ears?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It didn’t matter. Nothing mattered. Not anymore.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“H-Hajime… HAJIME—”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>And then he felt a pair of arms wrap around him. And everything stopped at once.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Nagito…” Chiaki whispered, cradling his head in her arms. She was standing now, holding him close. “Nagito, it’s okay. Everything will be okay. Shh. Try to match my breathing, okay?” Nagito hadn’t realised it, but his breaths were shallow and rapid, like he was drowning. Was he drowning? Wait, no, no. Chiaki was holding him. And it was okay.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He let himself slowly but surely match the tempo of her breathing, and the world seemed to come back into view. He saw the crystal blue sky from the window, and he could smell the tropical air waft past him. He was back in the hotel lobby.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>At least </span>
  <em>
    <span>he</span>
  </em>
  <span> was back.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“...You shouldn’t let your thoughts get a hold of you like that. You know Hajime is strong, and full of hope. You know he’s okay. And, you also know that the only way for anyone to leave this island is to collect everyone’s hope fragments, right? Then, everyone else </span>
  <em>
    <span>has</span>
  </em>
  <span> to spend time with you. But, that’s good — because then they’d get to know you, the real you. Just like Hajime did.” Chiaki cooed, stroking his hair.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Nagito faltered. “A-And… then we’ll leave this island, and I’ll see him…?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes, you will. I promise the moment you leave, you’ll see him again. And, he’ll be just as happy to see you as you’ll be.” Chiaki continued to rock back and forth with Nagito in her grasp, as he took in all that she said.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Ah… I see. Chiaki, you speak words of hope and I… couldn’t be any more lucky to be comforted by their presence alone. Thank you.” And for the first time that day, Nagito smiled.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Chiaki simply hummed in modesty, and they stayed like that for a little while longer. When Chiaki let go and slipped back into her seat, she picked up her Game Girl.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey, I don’t think we’ve collected all of each other’s hope fragments yet, so…” She held out the console to Nagito. “How about we start here?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Nagito stared at her for a moment, then remembered Hajime’s smiling face.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“...Of course, Chiaki.”</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>me love them......wa</p>
<p>pls stan Chiaki n Nagito friendship I beg,</p>
<p>(and now you probably understand why I tagged komahina too,,, heheah)<br/>(also, how did Nagito remember Hajime? uh gay ass glitch in the program cuz he’s too gay to forget)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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